WHILE TRAVELING WITH FRIENDS OR A ROMANTIC COMPANION CAN BE FUN, TRAVELING ALONE HAS UNIQUE ADVANTAGES, ESPECIALLY WHEN UNDERGOING LIFE- ALTERING EVENTS, LIKE A DIVORCE. WE ARE SURROUNDED BY NOISE AND DEMANDS AND GETTING AWAY ALONE ALLOWS US TO SEPARATE FROM OUR NOR- MAL ROUTINE AND FAMILIAR ENVIRONMENT, WHICH CAN OFTEN CLEAR OUR HEAD AND PROVIDE US WITH A FRESH PER- SPECTIVE. THERE ARE FIVE SIG- NIFICANT BENEFITS TO SETTING TIME ASIDE TO GET AWAY ALONE.

1/ Adopt a New Mindset

Stepping away from the familiar helps us self-reflect and determine if there are any attitudes or opinions we’ve held that aren’t positively serving us. We can deter- mine to begin thinking clearly and make positive pivots in our lifestyles that will be more beneficial to us in the long run. Writing down an action plan is vital and can help propel us to be more committed and consistent in following through.

2/ Diffuse Toxic Emotions

It’s not unusual to feel angry, bitter or even hateful, especially at the beginning of a marriage dissolution. And if the separation happened because of a spouse’s infidelity the negative feelings can be intense and often disruptive. We can’t ignore those emotions. They need to be acknowledged and worked through, whether alone or with a divorce coach. But it’s impor- tant to remember that those negative feelings are not hurting your former partner, they’re just terrorizing you. They may not go away instantly, but if you can decide to at least begin working through them, you’ll be one step closer to a healthier mindset.
“We grow when we try new experiences, meet new people and learn to enjoy being with ourselves.”

3/ Meet New People

We may have good friends and family with whom we feel comfortable. But unaccompanied by others in a restaurant, support group or at an event can make us more approachable. We often meet people who are going through similar situations as we are and can gain new perspectives from those we meet. We can make new friends and have an opportunity to flex our social muscles.

4/ Feel Empowered

Eating alone at a restaurant, taking a new fitness class in a new town, or simply planning a solo getaway and enjoying every minute of it can help us feel productive. We can learn to speak to ourselves in positive terms, acknowledge our strengths and begin learning to rise above the negative noise. When we try something new and realize we can do it well, our self- esteem gets a boost.

5/ Escape Your Comfort Zone

Simply engaging in a new and unfamiliar situation gets us out of our personal hideout and helps us feel more confident. We grow when we try new experiences, meet new people and learn to enjoy being with ourselves. We can start by taking baby steps and soon we realize that we are stronger than we once were, which can propel us even further forward. The first step is to make a plan to make a plan. Decide that your time away will be spent mapping out your future. Make sure you include some recreation but com- mit to make the purpose of your time away useful and constructive. It will prove to be an invaluable gift you give yourself.

MONIQUE REIDY is the president and publisher of Elysian Media Group which produces Divorcing Well Magazine, Southern California Life Magazine, weekendescapesmag.com, and thesavvygal.com. Stay connected at @moreidy and @divorcingwellmag

December 5, 2022
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